Film Review: The Swan Princess

Back when I was a small lad, I often enjoyed watching Disney animations. Most children do. I loved The Jungle Book, Hercules and some of the later Pixar features like A Bug's Life and Monsters Inc. For one reason or another I got it into my head that any animated films that weren't Disney were somehow inferior, cheaper or just plain bad. Whilst I enjoyed Anastasia, the Fox-funded, Russian-centric amnesia epic, I always felt it was on a separate level. As I've grown older, I've obviously watched less kids films, and I rarely get the chance to widen my perspective.

However, my good friend Rebecca Carter recently suggested one of her favourite animations from childhood, The Swan Princess, an independent 1994 film directed by Richard Rich. I hope he is well off financially. Now Becky knows me better than anyone and she was well aware that I would cross my arms during viewing, ripping apart the plot and nitpicking animation's typical absurdities. For example, in one scene where the protagonists are ballroom dancing, they inexplicably find themselves in a colourful starscape, devoid of a floor on which they can stand let alone dance. After she told me to shut up, I bought the DVD and sat down with her this evening in front of my room's television, promising not to say a word as she squeed with joy at the songs.
The story involves two royal children of different kingdoms being pushed into an arranged marriage for the sake of peace. However, putting aside the sheer unfairness of this agenda, the kids nevertheless grow to fall in love over the years, or at least as Prince Derrick is concerned, he gets an erection because she is hot. Sadly, an evil magical villain with a moustache wants to rule the Kingdoms, and therefore kidnaps Princess Odette, turning her into a part-time swan. I gather the inspiration for all this was a ballet, but the plot doesn't translate to film very well. Still, with an open mind, I continued watching, saying little, with Becky turning to me periodically with mock expressions of horror at dramatic moments. It was very funny.

Although it wasn't especially well received by critics at the time, and I don't feel it is exactly the best film I've ever seen, or even the best animated feature I've ever seen, The Swan Princess is quite progressive. Though essentially a retelling of any prince-must-rescue-the-princess-he-loves-from-evil-sorcerer plot, Odette is a surprisingly pro-active damsel in distress, not waiting around for Derrick to fumble around for magic clues in a library and using her swan wings to track him down. She also has the moral high ground in berating him for only loving her looks. In fact as the handsome hero, Derrick (and what a terrible hero name that is) appears rather unspectacular in this outing. He repeatedly attempts to kill his beloved in swan-form with a bow and arrow, utterly misinterprets a dying man's warning and barely notices any strange behaviour when the sorcerer's hag masquerades as Odette, proving even towards the conclusion that he hasn't learned to appreciate the princess beneath the skin. Nevertheless, this is feminism in action and is a good example to set children who are watching. Derrick does love Odette for who she is by the conclusion, and though it is the typical romantic fanfare, there is a noticeable lack of cheesiness: the dialogue is genuine and touching.

There is also a lot of humour and the voices are spot on, whilst there is a decent balance between physical cartoon gags and funny lines. I enjoyed it. I laughed a lot. I'm not going to deny this at all, and Becky was making the most of my wavering pride: "you're loving this, admit it". My favourite character is the turtle Speed, who's uninspired, ironic name nevertheless hides an exasperated, realistic and wise personality who helps the swan on her quest to escape moustache-bloke. John Cleese also puts in some voice work as an annoying French frog. Following a particularly amusing line about taxation, Becky observed that as children, we don't always completely listen to dialogue or the lyrics in musical interludes, our simple minds probably more interested in the vibrant visuals, and so it is interesting to go back after several years and get a new reading of a kid's film. Watching The Swan Princess has inspired me to look back at other films I've not seen since childhood and see what I get out of them now. Someone will have to lend me their DVDs, though, I'm not buying a load of Disney films for the sake of it.

Except maybe The Rescuers.


The Swan Princess might have a predictable and moralistic plot, but it is surprisingly progressive and genuinely funny, with memorable characters, good voiceovers and a catchy score. Yet they DON'T HAVE A FLOOR.

Hopefully another girly movie night will be in order next week, where I'll be able to rewatch this film with more people and laugh shamelessly all over again...